Beach Blanket Babylon, Shoreditch

Beach Blanket Babylon Shoreditch
Melt into the mood

The Vibe

Decadence incarnate, where money is to be spent and dark corners are to be hidden in. The decor is OTT; sculptures, rich furnishings and ornate lights, matched with slick hostesses, pricey drinks and an automatic desire to lie horizontally as you imbibe them. If you’re dressed for the place (think black, high heeled, well cuffed), you will melt into the mood and find yourself quite frankly turned on. Unlike its Notting Hill sister, this branch is more Shoreditch bling than West London socialite. Bohemian and beautiful, it describes itself as ‘luxurious Art Deco style meets 60’s and 70’s opulence’ and without a doubt sets the mood. Whilst the restaurant itself offers decent British/French classics, the temptation is to head straight to the basement cocktail lounge for nibbles and many drinks.

The Order

If eating in the restaurant, don’t bother with a full three courser- it’s likely you’ll want to get back down to the bar. Opt for the lamb cutlets with minted butter beans, peas and rosemary jus and a truffle mash or the stomach lining sweet pepper risotto, then commence the seduction downstairs with the Mango and Gin Slim (Bombay Sapphire, fresh mango, dash of coconut and lime) or their classic BBB mojito.

The Game

As discussed, just get your date in the downstairs bar as soon as possible. Warn them to dress up for an opulent joint otherwise they won’t enter the spirit. Drinks are all on the man this time, it’s old school glamour. Stay as long as it takes till you are necking in a dark corner, stay as late as possible but don’t burst the bubble by taking them home (unless you live in a dark and sparkling château). Summon them a cab home and bask in the glory of it all.

The Faults

Can wrack up a hell of a bill (cocktails around £9 mark and mains around £15), partly because you enter into the devil-may-care spirit. You have to be a particular sort of person (theatrical? minted?) to enjoy it, so make sure you check it out before- the website paints a good picture.

Sex Factor

4, possibly 5 but the sex will never be as good as the evening of debauched foreplay, leave it till next time (delayed gratification and all that…).


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